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Divorce Detox helps improve life after breakup

August 19, 2010 12:00:00 AM PDT
Splitting with your spouse can be tougher than you think. Here's what it takes to really detoxify your mind, body and soul from an emotional loss. The walk down the aisle is the happiest moment in many people's lives, the promise to stay together forever -- until reality sets in.

"I had a bad feeling all weekend," said Sonja Fisher, a Divorce Detox client. "I'm usually pretty intuitive of things going on around me and I got home and as I approached the door it started getting stronger and when I opened up the door, half the apartment was gone."

Fisher's 13-year marriage ended last year and suddenly the successful software sales rep was left broken and alone. That is, until she found Divorce Detox.

Divorce recovery specialist Allison Pescosolido and clinical psychologist Andra Brosh say their 10-week detox course is guaranteed to get you thinking positive after a divorce, breakup or any major relationship problem.

"What we found is that society is actually immune to divorce in a lot of ways because we're so used to it and so we sort of just expect people to get over it, but it's devastating," said Brosh.

"You need to do the work, you need to learn the skills and you can have a better life than you had before," said Pescosolido.

The course centers around weekly therapy sessions at their Santa Monica clinic.

At home, clients must follow a strict list of do's and don'ts:

  • Don't gossip or defame your ex in front of family, friends or kids
  • Don't snoop on your ex online
  • Don't share your dating life with your ex
  • Don't cling to the past
  • Do treat your ex with respect
  • Allow yourself to get emotional so you don't repeat the past
  • Set boundaries
  • Learn skills to become more independent

There's also homework in the course that includes writing in a daily journal and performing a task called "the stretch."

"We'll ask them to push through fears that they have, whether it's going and sitting at a bar by themselves, having dinner in a restaurant by themselves or going to a party where they don't know anybody," said Brosh.

For those dealing with other emotional traumas, founders here recommend another 10-week course called Healing Past Emotions.

"Andra and I are certified grief-recovery specialists," said Pescosolido. "You need to look at your past, and seeing how when you were a child what you took in, how you were repeating that throughout your life. So you don't want to make the same mistakes again."

Nearly 50 percent of all marriages in California end up in divorce. So Divorce Detox not only makes good sense, it's good business.

Each 10-week course costs up to $1,500, with group sessions costing an additional $300 apiece.

Sonja Fisher's health insurance paid for her treatment. And now her life is back on track. She's following her dream to become an actress and is even dating again.

"And I really found a great guy, I mean one of the ones that is a golden nugget that a lot of people would just pass over," said Fisher. "I'm so happy to be with him. He's just great. I've been with him four months now."


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